PROLOGUE Enter Chorus Chorus Vouchsafe to those that have not read the story, That I may prompt them: and of such as have, I humbly pray them to admit the excuse Of time, of numbers and due course of things, Which cannot in their huge and proper life Be here presented. Now we bear the king Toward Calais: grant him there; there seen, Heave him away upon your winged thoughts Athwart the sea. Behold, the English beach Pales in the flood with men, with wives and boys, Whose shouts and claps out-voice the deep mouth'd sea, Which like a mighty whiffler 'fore the king Seems to prepare his way: so let him land, And solemnly see him set on to London.
So swift a pace hath thought that even now You may imagine him upon Blackheath;Where that his lords desire him to have borne His bruised helmet and his bended sword Before him through the city: he forbids it, Being free from vainness and self-glorious pride;Giving full trophy, signal and ostent Quite from himself to God. But now behold, In the quick forge and working-house of thought, How London doth pour out her citizens!
The mayor and all his brethren in best sort, Like to the senators of the antique Rome, With the plebeians swarming at their heels, Go forth and fetch their conquering Caesar in:
As, by a lower but loving likelihood, Were now the general of our gracious empress, As in good time he may, from Ireland coming, Bringing rebellion broached on his sword, How many would the peaceful city quit, To welcome him! much more, and much more cause, Did they this Harry. Now in London place him;As yet the lamentation of the French Invites the King of England's stay at home;The emperor's coming in behalf of France, To order peace between them; and omit All the occurrences, whatever chanced, Till Harry's back-return again to France:
There must we bring him; and myself have play'd The interim, by remembering you 'tis past.
Then brook abridgment, and your eyes advance, After your thoughts, straight back again to France.
Exit SCENE I. France. The English camp. Enter FLUELLEN and GOWER GOWER Nay, that's right; but why wear you your leek today?
Saint Davy's day is past. FLUELLEN There is occasions and causes why and wherefore in all things: I will tell you, asse my friend, Captain Gower: the rascally, scald, beggarly, lousy, pragging knave, Pistol, which you and yourself and all the world know to be no petter than a fellow, look you now, of no merits, he is come to me and prings me pread and salt yesterday, look you, and bid me eat my leek: it was in place where I could not breed no contention with him;but I will be so bold as to wear it in my cap till I see him once again, and then I will tell him a little piece of my desires.
Enter PISTOL GOWER Why, here he comes, swelling like a turkey-cock. FLUELLEN 'Tis no matter for his swellings nor his turkey-cocks. God pless you, Aunchient Pistol!
you scurvy, lousy knave, God pless you! PISTOL Ha! art thou bedlam? dost thou thirst, base Trojan, To have me fold up Parca's fatal web?
Hence! I am qualmish at the smell of leek. FLUELLEN I peseech you heartily, scurvy, lousy knave, at my desires, and my requests, and my petitions, to eat, look you, this leek: because, look you, you do not love it, nor your affections and your appetites and your digestions doo's not agree with it, I would desire you to eat it. PISTOL Not for Cadwallader and all his goats. FLUELLEN There is one goat for you.
Strikes him Will you be so good, scauld knave, as eat it? PISTOL Base Trojan, thou shalt die. FLUELLEN You say very true, scauld knave, when God's will is:
I will desire you to live in the mean time, and eat your victuals: come, there is sauce for it.
Strikes him You called me yesterday mountain-squire; but Iwill make you to-day a squire of low degree. I pray you, fall to: if you can mock a leek, you can eat a leek. GOWER Enough, captain: you have astonished him. FLUELLEN I say, I will make him eat some part of my leek, or I will peat his pate four days. Bite, I pray you;it is good for your green wound and your ploody coxcomb. PISTOL Must I bite? FLUELLEN Yes, certainly, and out of doubt and out of question too, and ambiguities. PISTOL By this leek, I will most horribly revenge:
I eat and eat, I swear-- FLUELLEN Eat, I pray you: will you have some more sauce to your leek? there is not enough leek to swear by. PISTOL Quiet thy cudgel; thou dost see I eat. FLUELLEN Much good do you, scauld knave, heartily.
Nay, pray you, throw none away; the skin is good for your broken coxcomb. When you take occasions to see leeks hereafter, I pray you, mock at 'em; that is all. PISTOL Good. FLUELLEN Ay, leeks is good: hold you, there is a groat to heal your pate. PISTOL Me a groat! FLUELLEN Yes, verily and in truth, you shall take it; or Ihave another leek in my pocket, which you shall eat. PISTOL I take thy groat in earnest of revenge. FLUELLEN If I owe you any thing, I will pay you in cudgels:
you shall be a woodmonger, and buy nothing of me but cudgels. God b' wi' you, and keep you, and heal your pate.
Exit PISTOL All hell shall stir for this. GOWER Go, go; you are a counterfeit cowardly knave. Will you mock at an ancient tradition, begun upon an honourable respect, and worn as a memorable trophy of predeceased valour and dare not avouch in your deeds any of your words? I have seen you gleeking and galling at this gentleman twice or thrice. You thought, because he could not speak English in the native garb, he could not therefore handle an English cudgel: you find it otherwise; and henceforth let a Welsh correction teach you a good English condition. Fare ye well.
Exit PISTOL Doth Fortune play the huswife with me now?
News have I, that my Nell is dead i' the spital Of malady of France;And there my rendezvous is quite cut off.
Old I do wax; and from my weary limbs Honour is cudgelled. Well, bawd I'll turn, And something lean to cutpurse of quick hand.
To England will I steal, and there I'll steal:
And patches will I get unto these cudgell'd scars, And swear I got them in the Gallia wars.
