Why don't you say "Stop!" to Miss Ilsey? She cries twice as much as I do, And she's older and cries just from meanness,--for a ribbon or anything new.
Ma says it's her "sensitive nature." Oh my! No, I sha'n't stop my talk!
And I don't want no apples nor candy, and I don't want to go take a walk!
I know why you're mad! Yes, I do, now! You think that Miss Ilsey likes YOU, And I've heard her REPEATEDLY call you the bold-facest boy that she knew;
And she'd "like to know where you learnt manners." Oh yes! Kick the table,--that's right!
Spill the ink on my dress, and go then round telling Ma that I look like a fright!
What stories? Pretend you don't know that they're saying I broke off the match Twixt old Money-grubber and Mary, by saying she called him "Crosspatch,"
When the only allusion I made him about sister Mary was, she Cared more for his cash than his temper, and you know, Jack, you said that to me.
And it's true! But it's ME, and I'm scolded, and Pa says if I keep on I might By and by get my name in the papers! Who cares? Why, 'twas only last night I was reading how Pa and the sheriff were selling some lots, and it's plain If it's awful to be in the papers, why, Papa would go and complain.
You think it ain't true about Ilsey? Well, I guess I know girls, and I say There's nothing I see about Ilsey to show she likes you, anyway!
I know what it means when a girl who has called her cat after one boy Goes and changes its name to another's. And she's done it--and I wish you joy!
MISS EDITH MAKES ANOTHER FRIEND
Oh, you're the girl lives on the corner? Come in--if you want to--come quick!
There's no one but me in the house, and the cook--but she's only a stick.
Don't try the front way, but come over the fence--through the window--that's how.
Don't mind the big dog--he won't bite you--just see him obey me! there, now!
What's your name? Mary Ellen? How funny! Mine's Edith--it's nicer, you see;
But yours does for you, for you're plainer, though maybe you're gooder than me;
For Jack says I'm sometimes a devil, but Jack, of all folks, needn't talk, For I don't call the seamstress an angel till Ma says the poor thing must "walk."
Come in! It's quite dark in the parlor, for sister will keep the blinds down, For you know her complexion is sallow like yours, but she isn't as brown;
Though Jack says that isn't the reason she likes to sit here with Jim Moore.
Do you think that he meant that she kissed him? Would you--if your lips wasn't sore?
If you like, you can try our piano. 'Tain't ours. A man left it here To rent by the month, although Ma says he hasn't been paid for a year.
Sister plays--oh, such fine variations!--why, I once heard a gentleman say That she didn't mind THAT for the music--in fact, it was just in her way!
Ain't I funny? And yet it's the queerest of all that, whatever I say, One half of the folks die a-laughing, and the rest, they all look t'other way.
And some say, "That child!" Do they ever say that to such people as you?
Though maybe you're naturally silly, and that makes your eyes so askew.
Now stop--don't you dare to be crying! Just as sure as you live, if you do, I'll call in my big dog to bite you, and I'll make my Papa kill you, too!
And then where'll you be? So play pretty. There's my doll, and a nice piece of cake.
You don't want it--you think it is poison! Then I'LL eat it, dear, just for your sake!
WHAT MISS EDITH SAW FROM HER WINDOW
Our window's not much, though it fronts on the street;
There's a fly in the pane that gets nothin' to eat;
But it's curious how people think it's a treat For ME to look out of the window!
Why, when company comes, and they're all speaking low, With their chairs drawn together, then some one says, "Oh!
Edith dear!--that's a good child--now run, love, and go And amuse yourself there at the window!"
