There she was with these treasures untouched, neglected and perplexed.A woman who loves wants to give.It is the duty and business of the man she has married for love to help her to help and give.But I was stupid.My eyes had never been opened.I was stiff with her and difficult to her, because even on my wedding morning there had been, deep down in my soul, voiceless though present, something weakly protesting, a faint perception of wrong-doing, the infinitesimally small, slow-multiplying germs of shame.
3
I made my breach with the party on the Budget.
In many ways I was disposed to regard the 1909 Budget as a fine piece of statecraft.Its production was certainly a very unexpected display of vigour on the Liberal side.But, on the whole, this movement towards collectivist organisation on the part of the Liberals rather strengthened than weakened my resolve to cross the floor of the house.It made it more necessary, I thought, to leaven the purely obstructive and reactionary elements that were at once manifest in the opposition.I assailed the land taxation proposals in one main speech, and a series of minor speeches in committee.
The line of attack I chose was that the land was a great public service that needed to be controlled on broad and far-sighted lines.
I had no objection to its nationalisation, but I did object most strenuously to the idea of leaving it in private hands, and attempting to produce beneficial social results through the pressure of taxation upon the land-owning class.That might break it up in an utterly disastrous way.The drift of the government proposals was all in the direction of sweating the landowner to get immediate values from his property, and such a course of action was bound to give us an irritated and vindictive land-owning class, the class upon which we had hitherto relied--not unjustifiably--for certain broad, patriotic services and an influence upon our collective judgments that no other class seemed prepared to exercise.Abolish landlordism if you will, I said, buy it out, but do not drive it to a defensive fight, and leave it still sufficiently strong and wealthy to become a malcontent element in your state.You have taxed and controlled the brewer and the publican until the outraged Liquor Interest has become a national danger.You now propose to do the same thing on a larger scale.You turn a class which has many fine and truly aristocratic traditions towards revolt, and there is nothing in these or any other of your proposals that shows any sense of the need for leadership to replace these traditional leaders you are ousting.This was the substance of my case, and I hammered at it not only in the House, but in the press....
The Kinghampstead division remained for some time insensitive to my defection.
Then it woke up suddenly, and began, in the columns of the KINGSHAMPSTEAD GUARDIAN, an indignant, confused outcry.I was treated to an open letter, signed Junius Secundus," and I replied in provocative terms.There were two thinly attended public meetings at different ends of the constituency, and then I had a correspondence with my old friend Parvill, the photographer, which ended in my seeing a deputation.
My impression is that it consisted of about eighteen or twenty people.They had had to come upstairs to me and they were manifestly full of indignation and a little short of breath.There was Parvill himself, J.P., dressed wholly in black--I think to mark his sense of the occasion--and curiously suggestive in his respect for my character and his concern for the honourableness of the KINGHAMPSTEAD GUARDIAN editor, of Mark Antony at the funeral of Cesar.There was Mrs.Bulger, also in mourning; she had never abandoned the widow's streamers since the death of her husband ten years ago, and her loyalty to Liberalism of the severest type was part as it were of her weeds.There was a nephew of Sir Roderick Newton, a bright young Hebrew of the graver type, and a couple of dissenting ministers in high collars and hats that stopped halfway between the bowler of this world and the shovel-hat of heaven.
There was also a young solicitor from Lurky done in the horsey style, and there was a very little nervous man with a high brow and a face contracting below as though the jawbones and teeth had been taken out and the features compressed.The rest of the deputation, which included two other public-spirited ladies and several ministers of religion, might have been raked out of any omnibus going Strandward during the May meetings.They thrust Parvill forward as spokesman, and manifested a strong disposition to say "Hear, hear!" to his more strenuous protests provided my eye wasn't upon them at the time.
I regarded this appalling deputation as Parvill's apologetic but quite definite utterances drew to an end.I had a moment of vision.
Behind them I saw the wonderful array of skeleton forces that stand for public opinion, that are as much public opinion as exists indeed at the present time.The whole process of politics which bulks so solidly in history seemed for that clairvoyant instant but a froth of petty motives above abysms of indifference....
Some one had finished.I perceived I had to speak.
"Very well," I said, "I won't keep you long in replying.I'll resign if there isn't a dissolution before next February, and if there is I shan't stand again.You don't want the bother and expense of a bye-election (approving murmurs) if it can be avoided.
But I may tell you plainly now that I don't think it will be necessary for me to resign, and the sooner you find my successor the better for the party.The Lords are in a corner; they've got to fight now or never, and I think they will throw out the Budget.
