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第64章

DORLANGE TO MARIE-GASTON

Paris, April, 1839.

Dear Friend,--For better or for worse, I continue my candidacy without a constituency to elect me.This surprises my friends and worries me, for it is only a few weeks now to the general election; and if it happens that all this mysterious "preparation" comes to nought, a pretty figure I shall cut in the caricatures of Monsieur Bixiou, of whose malicious remarks on the subject you lately wrote me.

One thing reassures me: it does not seem likely that any one would have sown two hundred and fifty thousand francs in my electoral furrow without feeling pretty sure of gathering a harvest.Perhaps, to take a cheerful view of the matter, this very slowness may be considered as showing great confidence of success.

However that may be, I am kept by this long delay in a state of inaction which weighs upon me.Astride as it were of two existences,--one in which I have not set foot, the other in which my foot still lingers,--I have no heart to undertake real work; I am like a traveller who, having arrived before the hour when the diligence starts, does not know what to do with his person nor how to spend his time.You will not complain, I think, that I turn this enforced far niente to the profit of our correspondence; and now that I am thus at leisure, I shall take up two points in your last letter which did not seem to me of sufficient importance to pay much attention to at the time: I refer to your warning that my parliamentary pretensions did not meet the approval of Monsieur Bixiou; and to your suggestion that I might expose myself to falling in love with Madame de l'Estorade--if I were not in love with her already.Let us discuss, in the first instance, Monsieur Bixiou's grand disapprobation--just as we used to talk in the olden time of the grand treachery of Monsieur de Mirabeau.

I'll describe that man to you in a single word.Envy.In Monsieur Bixiou there is, unquestionably, the makings of a great artist; but in the economy of his existence the belly has annihilated the heart and the head, and he is now and forever under the dominion of sensual appetites; he is riveted to the condition of a caricaturist,--that is to say, to the condition of a man who from day to day discounts himself in petty products, regular galley-slave pot-boilers, which, to be sure, give him a lively living, but in themselves are worthless and have no future.With talents misused and now impotent, he has in his mind, as he has on his face, that everlasting and despairing grinwhich human thought instinctively attributes to fallen angels.Just as the Spirit of darkness attacks, in preference, great saints because they recall to him most bitterly the angelic nature from which he has fallen, so Monsieur Bixiou delights to slaver the talents and characters of those who he sees have courageously refused to squander their strength, sap, and aims as he has done.

But the thing which ought to reassure you somewhat as to the danger of his calumny and his slander (for he employs both forms of backbiting)is that at the very time when he believes he is ****** a burlesque autopsy of me he is actually an obedient puppet whose wire I hold in my hands, and whom I am ****** talk as I please.Being convinced that a certain amount of noisy discussion would advance my political career, I looked about me for what I may call a public crier.Among these circus trumpets, if I could have found one with a sharper tone, a more deafening blare than Bixiou's, I would have chosen it.As it was, I have profited by the malevolent curiosity which induces that amiable lepidopter to insinuate himself into all studios.I confided the whole affair to him; even to the two hundred and fifty thousand francs (which I attributed to a lucky stroke at the Bourse), I told him all my plans of parliamentary conduct, down to the number of the house I have bought to conform to the requirements of the electoral law.It is all jotted down in his notebook.

That statement, I think, would somewhat reduce the admiration of his hearers in the salon Montcornet did they know of it.As for the political horoscope which he has been so kind as to draw for me, Icannot honestly say that his astrology is at fault.It is very certain that with my intention of following no set of fixed opinions, I must reach the situation so admirably summed up by the lawyer of Monsieur de la Palisse, when he exclaimed with burlesque emphasis: "What do you do, gentlemen, when you place a man in solitude? You isolate him."Isolation will certainly be my lot, and the artist-life, in which a man lives alone and draws from himself like the Great Creator whose work he toils to imitate, has predisposed me to welcome the situation.

But although, in the beginning especially, it will deprive me of all influence in the lobbies, it may serve me well in the tribune, where Ishall be able to speak with strength and *******.Being bound by no promises and by no party trammels, nothing will prevent me from being the man I am, and expressing, in all their sacred crudity, the ideas which I think sound and just.I know very well that before an audience plain, honest truth may fail to be contagious or even welcome.But have you never remarked that, by using our opportunities wisely, we finally meet with days which may be called the festivals of morality and intelligence, days on which, naturally and almost without effort, the thought of good triumphs?

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